To d person i considered my soulmate. . .

When u came into my life, i told myself i would lov u n never gonna hurt u .U were my bstfrn, my lop, n my

everything.untill one day, u came n said "im sick, im
afraid i cant stay wid u any longer." I refuse to belive
u at first but when i saw those tears fell down from ur
cheeks,it spells out the truth about how u really feel
inside.U were deeply hurt. . . . i know i was hurt too : ( . U cant even look straight into my eyes when u
said "it was too late." My life has changed at that
very moment, i just found myself on bended knees
yelling n asking "why?" I was down completely but i
had to be strong for u. . . untill the days has come for
us to say GOODBYE. I knew it, but i jst cant accept it. If only i knew that was the last time,i should have
held u and never let go. The kiss, whisper, n embrace
it was the last. . . . I can feel ur arms falling down
slowlyi knw u're gone. W e always thought our love
was enough for us to last.It was a sad ending. .. . its god's will. . . .I know u r happy now wherever u r, n m here im hurting broken. . . Those two long years,
its all gone now how can i forget? How can i start
over once again? I'm sorry if u see my life falling
apart. . i know i cant get u back n i want to b seeing u
for the rest of my life. Its more than a year now this
has been the longest year of my life. The most painful time i ever had. The sadness of the night brings back the days we had, the time u let go of me
n the moment dat i surrendered you. .. even silence
reminds me of all the sorrow,pain n my
hopelessness. Let me suffer in silence till i get over
u, slowly i can let u go n i will be me once again. I will
b keeping my promise. . . i will move on,but ull always b a part of me. Hear me say this, one last
time. . i have found the esseence of my life. I have
discovered a world that's so beautiful because of u, my love, my misery. . . . .Im letting go of u now. . . .its time to set myself free. .. . this is the
hardest thing i will do coz i still love u :'

21 yrs boy story

5 yrs ago,I was on class 11.It was Dec 24,yeah,still in my mind.My classmate girl proposed me.I though was nt willing to b relation bcz of her talent I accepted.Ma ramrari tyo kt sanga boleko ni thina,bt saathi le malai vanyo ki she loves u vanera n next day she proposed me.I was on full regret for what i did.bt after some daz bt things went well..Nd finally one month later we had date.I kissed her lips in 1st date,I feel ki I was in love aba.All things were going well.I was in deep love too.I promised her ki I wont leave her in my life,bt achamma laagxa she never told me such word though she proposed me.On dat mean tym mero family condition ni ramro thena,n she alws make on issue of my family n want to give brkup.She had attempt it for at least 5 times...Usko didi haru koi australia ,koi denmark,i think so she want prosperity on me.Malai laagxa,if she tried we culd make our reltn success bt ghar ma kei prblm vayexa ane she told abt me infront of her parents,oviously ni tym na aai kana kunai kura garyo vane,rezlt naramro nai hunxa..usle yo sochnu parni thio,talent thi,bt maturity thena jasto laagyo paxi.nd she came on crying,saying mero faily lai tmro barema vane,n they scold me.My family are unhappy rey kya,so brkup garum..aba ma k vannu twaaa pare..... tyo 5tH attempt thio tesko..n maile ok vannu bahek kei vanna sakina...tetikhera usle vaneko dialogue ni yaad xa"ta mero thau maa vaako vaye k garthis?" rey.....ma k ans dinu...she want to brokeup..usko aakha maa aasu thyo so malai k vanu k navanu vo..so tero happiness tesma xa vanera I left.but i loved her truly.even i still go thru her fb till now though she unfrend me..usko saathi sanga ni usko barema sodhxu..brkup paxi ko usko evry b'day ma wish garxu,bt she avoid it...... malai euta ques xa mind ma,Y she leave me,family ko kura liyera brk up dida paila maile nai samjayera patch up gareko the...so again family ko kura le brkup di..brkup vaisake paxi ni 1yr samma i tried to convince bt maandin marigaye pani....Usle propose gari tru luv ma maa feel vo n she left me....Hamro future xaina vanthi bt her little try culd change bt she was nt willing to do it.I still love her,bt I afraid to contact her,aba..I want her in my lyf bt I kno feri contact gare vane usle ignore nai garxe..........what suld I do?? n what love do u all call this,as??

Nyc story

I was just eight years old, but I had brought her down to her last frayed nerve. "I hate doing chores!" I yelled defiantly. My older sister was no better. "I hate doing homework!" she would whine incessantly.

My mother was finally fed up. She could have yelled at us and told us that sometimes, in life, you have to do things you hate. This would have made sense and probably is what most parents tell their kids. But my mother was different. She didn't handle things like most parents would. She was more creative.

My mother thought for a minute. Then she grabbed a couple pieces of paper and some pens. She said to us, "Ok, kids, over the next week, I want you to write down everything you hate, whether it's chores, or homework, or someone annoying at school. Anything at all. I am going to do the same thing, and we're going to go over our lists at the end of the week." We were a bit confused as to why we should do this, but we decided to do as she said.

By the end of the week, each of us had several pages of items. We had listed everything from "I hate school" to "I hate broccoli" and "I hate my classmate who broke my favorite pen." I suppose it was cathartic for all of us and I assumed that just writing these things down would be the end of this strange project my mother had designed. I was wrong.

After dinner at the end of the week, my mother took us to the beach and we made a small bonfire. I wasn't sure why we were doing this but I always loved bonfires, so I wasn't complaining. My mother brought chocolate and juices and crackers to make s'mores.

"Ok, now we're going to read out loud everything we hate!" my mother said with a gleeful smile. And so we did. It took a little while but we got through all of our "I hate" statements. That's when my mother did something shocking. Suddenly, she took our "I hate" lists and said, "Now we must let go of all this hate! This is too much hate to have in your hearts. You put your hates down on these papers, and now your hates are here. And now, they shall be gone!" With that, my mother threw our "I hate" lists into the bonfire.

We watched as the fire ate the papers. My mother beamed with joy, and all of a sudden I felt a great weight lifted. The hate was destroyed! The remarkable thing is that it really worked. In the time the followed, I didn't feel like complaining as much. I forgave others more easily. I was more at peace.

This listing and burning of "I hate" statements has become a tradition in my house. We do it every year and when the papers burn, we feast and s'mores and marvel in our hate-free lives. Now I think I will do the same thing with my children, and I hope they will do it with theirs. These many years later, whenever I hear the words "I hate," I immediately think of the fire and I burn them up. Hate is not a part of my life.

THE DARK KNIGHT

One day I won't just be here,
I shall belong here

Squandering around out in this wilderness of the city, in a companion of unknown solitariness, feeling the jitters of being lonesome in the midst of crowd. Sounds like being paranoid, doesn't it? No paranoia to be fair, it’s what I've been going through. Sitting here devoid of ideas, not knowing what's going on around, feeling hard to breathe in the air of this fanatic city. Every time I try to be part of the crowd, a little voice in me yells that I don’t belong here, I don’t belong in this crowd. That's how life is!

I look up to people around me, people that are part of these crowd, people I've termed as getting inspiration from. I see them with their stature, charisma, designation. I see them with a sense of belonging to this crowd. The people that hold their own distinctive ground in this gruesome crowd and are applauded for that. I see them getting praised around for their intellectuality, respected for their deeds and keenly attended. The fact is they didn’t get that by birth, but by virtue of earned respect and character. They have earned the right to come up here as prominent rhetorician and put forth their views, share their conscience.

Hereby I am, stuck in a maze, trying to figure the way out. Living up with the respect dented apart. Doing my bit of soul searching to garner any sort of pride left. Should I react or should I respond? I too want that bit of respect for myself .I too want to be the part of the crowd. I too want to sense the feel of belonging to the very nature of the crowd.

Deep within me, I know that I have dreams not schemes. Maybe one day I won't just be here to show my mere physical presence but because I too belong to this very crowd. Maybe one day I shall have a sense of respect for myself earned and intact, my intellectual nature applauded, my words listened keenly, the whole of me belonging here. The little voice in me this time yells that “One day I won’t just be here, I shall belong here”. Maybe one day!

Maybe that one day, a young guy would look up to me and feel the same way I felt today, would come up and write the same very words as I've written down, would keep hands on his heart and take the same oath as me and say yeah I too want to earn that bit of respect, aura, charisma and designation like him. Maybe one day!

fake love caught

"Mero fren ko usko bf sanga break up vayo. Kta le nai chodeko thyo. For sometime she was in grief. But paxi she got over it. She has a bf now and they are happy and i hope they will remain the same.

Kura k ho vane, break up vako kei time paxi usko ex bf ko ni gf vayo but paxi kt le chod diyo. Then he tried to come back. But my fren was already committed. Jhagada parla jasto vayo so i came in between. Maile tyo kta lai samjhaye. Now it was not possible for her to come back to him. He was the one who left her and she is with someone else now.
But he was depressed. Maile samjhaune kosis gare ani he asked for my phone number. He said he was depressed and my words were comforting so he wanted to call me whenever he feels sad. Maile number diye coz he was looking depressed and help gardai ma k janxa ra.
He started to call me saying he was sad and sick of life and all. I never liked him for leaving my friend but he was depressed, atleast i was convinced that he was depressed so i helped him.
He started to call me late at night. I hate it when people call me late at night. So i told him not to do so,but he never listened. I was annoyed.
One night he calls me and all of a sudden he tells me that he loves me. Maile no nai vane ra clear gare ki i was not interested in him and was only helping him to overcome his depression.
Arko din usle mero colz bahira ayera propose garyo feri and again i cleared that i don't have feelings for him.
Tyo din clz ma mero fren(kta ko ex) le vanyo ki maybe i was giving him wrong impression ani he fell for me coz i was talking to him.
Maile ni soche ki sayed merai galti thiyo but i was just trying to help. I saw a pic of him or his wrist with many cuts the next day on fb. He called me and told me that it was for me. I was in dilemma. I wasted my whole day looking at that pic and thinking.
After some days he came to meet me outside clz and was ranting the same thing. I noticed his arm and there were no cut marks. Even if it was not so deep cut, the mark stays for sometime and there his arm was clean, no cut marks. I didn't say anything coz maybe he didn't want to cut and thats good.
But he lied and i was suspious. I wanted to know what was on his mind. I didn't want him to take wrong hints so i was not talking to him. But i wanted to know if he was true coz only feeling i had for him was sympathy and i wanted to know if he was worth it or not.
So, i hacked his fb account. His email id was not real so i was able to hack his account. I checked his chat history and found out some shocking truths. He was never in love with me. He figured out that he was not getting his ex back so he was timepassing wid me. Usko sathiharu sanga mero barema kura vako raixa. I was stupid to help him. And it was good that i found out earlier natra love parna k ber. Sympathy garda garda love nai parna sakthyo ni. How can someone fake it? Euta payena vanera arko lai ghumaune. Ma vane mero galti ho vanera basirako the. Huna ta merai galti ho. I confronted him and he was sorry for his acts. That was it, i never spoke to him after that.
Now i have to think 100 times before trusting someone. "

Love make life hella

yo lov vanne kura pani k hola? mero life nai hell banai deko theyo ek choti...
11 class ma huda euta kta last paxi lagthyo, manxe herda chahe handsom theyo bt dhani bau ko eklo choro, paisale mattiyeko, smoke garne, sangat pani testai, padai ma zero, almost useless fellow .....
lastai crazy theyo ek choti hat katera name pani lekhya theyo(1st letter)....yeti dherai maya garda ni k bhau khojeko hola vanera sab le malai nai naramro vane...dashain tihar ko vacation paxi ramro sanga kura gare tyo sanga aani smoke xodera ramro manxe banxu vanyo aani maile yes vane.....
.kukur ko pucchar 12 maina samma dhungro ma rakheni bango ko bango vane jastai k sudrithyo ra ultai merai life hell jastai banayo..
clz ma koi kta haru sanga bolna na hune incase koi kta sanga padai kai barema kura gareni jhagada garna jane......class ma tai sanga matra basna parne....aafu chahe sab kt sanga bolera jiskera basne maile chahe koi sanga bolnu pani na hune...kasaile malai herna pani nahune...uffff...
clz bus student ma aaba bus pani chadna nahunere aaru kta le herxan re taivara jaile lina aaune ra gar puraidine garthyo..
clz ma theyo nai skirt aaba teska lage pant ka khojna janu...skirt launa na hune...fb ma kasaile cute ya kunai ramro cmnt garya xa vane tharkai dine...kati strict ho...
yeti strict ta mero garma pani gardainan eklo chori padai ma pani ramro sable maya garne clz ma pani one of de bst student...tesle garda sathe haru sab tada vaye...jabo 2 maina relation ma baseko dherai barsa dekhe tym nai stop vako jasto feel vayo..jail ma base jastai lagthyo...1st term ma clz 2nd vako manxema 2nd term ma 8th position ma jhare...dukha lagyo...tyo sanga relation ma basera future nai barbad ta hune haina jasto lagyo aani brk up diye....ka sajilai manne manxe thiyo ra...fb ma block hani diye, no. change garidiye..dhanna gar dekhako thena bich bato ma pugesi tai ho vanera jharera janthe....
11 ko board pre board ko exm ra bida le garda teti dukha dena...aajai ek barsa theyo tyo sanga padnu parne kasari clz jane vanera tension lagera thyo...computer class ko 2ta section theyo..principal lai vanera section change gare...teacher kai around basna thale..leisure period vayo vane teacher room gayer teacher sanga discuss garera basthe...
yesari distance maintain gare at last clas ma aayera timi khusi hunxau vane ma timro paxi lagdina bt I lov u vanera white board ma lekhera gayo...
khusi vaye...12 pani sakiyo
aaile tyo aafno bato ma aafno bato...life ma kaile lov gardina vanera kan samate..
aaile 2nd year ma xu bf banako xaina dherai khusi xu..lov garda pani gardina...bf vanda sathe harunai thek xa kamse kam friendship ma kunai condition ta hudaina, kuni criteria ta hudaina...

Sad story

I left the chemist shop having bought my medicine. As I was looking for a taxi to go room, I noticed an old man crouched under an electric pole outside the shop.

It was dusk time so he was not clearly visible. He was clutching an old bag containing rags, probably his only belongings. His streched-out arm showed some coins in his palm. Obviously, he was seeking alms!

Initially, I thought the season's cold had driven him into the corner. Or, maybe he was hiding from the police. Then I thought that the man was probably sick and had tried to persuade the chemist to give him some medicine free of cost. So, the exasperated poor man lodged himself in the corner.

I observed him for a few minutes and concluded that in any case he needed help. I dug my hand into my pocket and decided to hand over to him whatever currency note came into my hand. It turned out to be a Rs 50 note. I hesitated for a moment and placed it in his palm.

The man looked at the note and then at me bewilderment. Normally, people throw coins towards him but here he saw a currency note. "God bless you. You're an angel" he mumbled in English pointing to the note. This time he surprised me with his accent. On my request, he followed me to a secluded but well lit place on a side street.

I asked him his name. He replied "pls don't ask me that. It embrasses m. You may call me Mr X." He wouldn't give me his address either. The man also refused to identify members of his family. For several moments, he looked into my eyes intently as if he was suspecting my bonafides and wanted to be sure that he was talking to a genuine well wisher.

He command of the English language and his diction did not gel with his tattered clothes. The man who looked like a "begger" which he was not, stumped me and raised my quisitiveness.

A few pressing questions brought out the agonizing facts of his life. He turned out to be one of the many elderly persons who had enjoyed a fairly good life growing up but had to go through all kinds of suffering in their older years!

Mr X, too, had a reasonably good upbringing and schooling. He went to convent school, then to university and got a senior position in a semi govt organization.

He was earning a handsome salary but led a simple life himself to save substantially for his children- two sons and a daughter. Mr X immensely loved his daughter on whose marriage he spent lavishly and gave costly gifts. The sons were given the best possible education that earned them lucrative jobs in the private sector as well as attractive marriage proposals that fructified.

Mr X used a bank loan to finance a big two-section house in a prime locality that he said he would bequeath to his sons.
He wanted the joint family to stay in their old house for sentimental reasons. But the sons and their wives rose in revolt against family head's wishes.

They were in a great hurry to multiply the wealth they would have otherwise inherited after the old man's death.

The man who remained ill-fed and ill-clad to save for his children was now getting targeted. He became and irritant in his own home in which the old man was losing control.

Family tensions weighed heavily on the health of Mr X's wife, a no-non-sense lady. Her sons and daughters-in-law did not find spending money on her failing health worthwhile. She died of shock and ill treatment, leaving her husband to bear the burnt alone.

One day, Mr X was made to vacate his bedroom and stay in the maid's room. But at night he choose to move out of his house for good and stay in street corners where I had found him begging.

As he narrated this, he sobbed and saluted in the air. I looked at him in surprise. He mumbled "while leaving my place I had salute my house and said goodbye to it. I will do it till my death, wherever I am and whenever I am reminded of it!!"